Bitty, in (not so) Brief

Here is the difference between Bitty (#3, 11 years old) and all of our other children.  The other children, asking me a question:

Bunchkin: Do you know where my book is?
Bundle: Do you know where my book is?
Shmooey: Do you know where my book is?
Bee-Boy: Do you know where my book is?
Pookey: Do you know where my book is?
Doodle: Do you know where my book is?

Bitty, asking me a question:

Bitty: Oh momma!  Do you know what happened?!  I was getting ready for bed and I realized… I don’t have anything to read!  I can never fall asleep if I don’t read something first, I just always have to read a book to fall asleep, did you do that when you were little, Momma, read a book before you fell asleep?  Bunchkin does that, too, but she reads different books than I do because she’s older and she likes different kinds of books and that’s okay because that’s just our personalities, we’re different from each other and isn’t that so funny how different we are?!  Like Buchkin likes to practice, but I don’t really like to practice, but sometimes I like to practice especially if I’m playing a game where I’m a little girl who practices her violin, and I have to practice really hard, because I’m going to perform in a huge concert with two million people – isn’t that a lot of people, Momma?  And I need to do a good job so I have to practice really, really hard and if I play that game then it’s fun to practice, but Bunchkin likes to practice all of the time, and we’re really different that way, but we both like reading books!  Isn’t that so funny, Momma, how we’re both the same and we’re different?!  So, anyway, Bunchkin was already in bed and I was ready to go to bed, so I got up and went to find my Pilgrims Progress book, because that’s the book I’ve been reading and that’s the book I wanted to read tonight… You know, Pilgrims Progress, where Christian goes on that journey and does all those things?  Well, I just love reading Pilgrims Progress  because I love to pretend to be Christian and do all the things that Christian does on his journey, and Shmooey and I like to play Pilgrims Progress together and sometimes Pookey plays with us but mostly she doesn’t because she doesn’t really like to play Pilgrims Progress but Bee-Boy will play with us sometimes, when he’s not playing a Narnia game – OH – and Momma, do you know why I love playing Narnia games?!  Because in Narnia games we get to play like we’re in the woods and pretend it’s snowing and Shmooey pretends to be Aslan and sometimes Bundle pretends to be Mr. Tumnus, but I really like to pretend to be Mr. Tumnus so sometimes Bundle will pretend to be Mrs. Beaver, if Bunchkin isn’t playing like she’s Mrs. Beaver because she really likes Mrs. Beaver, too, and anyway, we like to play that together so I was looking for my book, but not the Narnia book because I’ve already read that, like, a hundred times, so I was looking for my Pilgrims Progress book.  I’ve already ready my Pilgrims Progress book a lot, too, but I still like it because I haven’t read it too many times, you know, and anyway it’s really fun to pretend to be Christian and if I’m going to be Christian I have to know the things that Christian says, so I need to read that book, like, a lot of times.  But when I got up and went to find my Pilgrims Progress book, it was nowhere!  And so I kept looking and I looked underneath my bed but I didn’t find it – but you know what I did find?!  I found my little dog!  You know, that little dog that has those ears and that fur, the one that I really like to play with?  I’ve been looking for that little dog everywhere because I have a little dog game that I play and I haven’t been able to play my little dog game because I couldn’t find my little dog!  But I did pretend like my cat was a little dog sometimes – you know that little orange cat, the one with the tail and the eyes that kind of do that thing?  Well, I would pretend like that was my little dog because it kind of looks like a little dog if you squint your eyes and tilt your head sideways, so I was playing like my little cat was my little dog, but now I found my little dog!  Isn’t that exciting?!  I was so excited about that but I still didn’t find my Pilgrims Progress book, so I decided to look in the garage, because I remember reading it in the garage that day that Bunchkin needed me to watch the goats for her – remember when I watched the goats for her, Momma, because she had to go and fix that thing and I was the only one who could watch them because everyone else was working on the other thing with daddy?  So anyway, I took my book out there and I was reading it because I was playing a game that I was a little shepherd girl and I had to watch my goats and I was reading my book but I had to be very careful that a fox didn’t leap out of the woods and get my goats while I was reading my book, so you know what I did?  I pretended that Scotch was my guard dog, and she would tell me if a fox came, because you know how Scotch will do that thing with her mouth and she’ll kind of stomp her foot that certain way, and that was my signal that a fox was coming and so I had to pay attention to her while I was reading my book and it was really hard but it was really fun, but my book wasn’t out there and now I don’t know where it could be because I’ve looked everywhere and it’s just nowhere!  Do you know where my book is?

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